Survivalist Logbook
8/10/07 P.A. – The Evening Post
Okay, now I’m freaking out big time. That and my head hurts like crazy. Before last fall we found the zombies were coming across the pedestrian bridge from the Meadow. Easy enough, Phil said, we’ll just chain the gate on the other side. Simple enough, zombies only know how to shamble at best, they don’t have enough sense to get a pair of bolt cutters and cut the chain, they just walk off or get run over on the highway. Cuts down the number of zombies from that vector. Sure enough, all the muddy zombies that were trying to break down the barricade were gone, we just had the rest of them to contend with.
I always had a copy of the key since I’d gotten locked out of the house when I was a kid. There weren’t zombies then, but there may as well have been. It was the dog next door and his owner, the biggest kid in my class that hated my guts. I’d forgotten my key again, hey, I was a kid! First the dog chased me up the tree. He was a big dog with a head the size of his chest and a mouth that could grab your head whole. I’d always see him chewing on a four-by-four from my window. He had a sixth sense too – he always knew when I was looking at him, even when the window was closed in the middle of winter. He’d be splintering the end of the lumber or a piece of firewood with those big teeth, then look up at me and start barking in that low bark that would rattle the windows. So there I was, up in the tree. I could hear the television up way too loud in the living room and my grandpappy hooting and hollering, quoting the woman on the bicycle saying: “…and your little dog too!” Little dog. Wish the hornless carnivore bull next door was a little dog too. So there I was, up in the tree, reaching out and grabbing the walnuts and pelting the dog as he was circling around below me, then Chuck came over to see what his dog was doing. He looked up at me with his grimacing smile and said “You hit my dog? I’m gonna come up there and beat you silly, then throw you off the tree for Daisy to finish you off!”
Daisy. A dog the size of a mack truck called “Daisy”. And it was a boy dog, too! Chuck started climbing the tree as my parents pulled in, my dad rolling down the window and yelling at him and Daisy who was relieving himself while he watched Chuck climbing back down. Daisy charged at dad and dad punched the dog in the nose then grabbed Chuck by the shirt and shoved him back toward his house, then made him clean up the dog’s mess, throwing it back into his own yard. They didn’t even know I was up in the tree, even though Chuck told them I was throwing walnuts at Daisy. After dad stood and waited until Chuck and Daisy were inside, he walked into the house with mom and slammed the door.
I climbed down from the tree and went to the door, but it was locked! I banged on the door but dad was yelling over the cackling of the woman who turned into a witch on tv and grandpappy who was cackling along with her and they didn’t hear me. I heard a low growl and saw Daisy looking at me from behind the bushes. Above him I saw Chuck and his evil “I’m gonna get you now” grin. I banged on the door like crazy as I watched the drool string from Daisy’s mouth hit the dirt. Suddenly the door I was banging on was gone and my scalp felt like it was getting pulled off my head ‘cause my dad pulled me in by my hair and started yelling at me for making so much noise. I was going to get eaten alive either before or after Chuck beat me to a pulp and he was yelling at me for making too much noise! Well, that kind of ingrained always having my keys.
So anyway, I went across the pedestrian bridge, clearing off the debris so I wouldn’t catch my foot if I bagged a deer in the Meadow. We hadn’t been there since last fall, so who knows? They may have started coming back. I walked up and into the Meadow, remembering the way it used to be as I passed the dilapidated buildings. They’d always keep the grass cropped short where there was grass, most of it was crushed by the motor homes people would use to “camp”. At the top of the hill I could see a whole lot of animals gathered together near the beaver pond. It was weird. I didn’t know they all got along so well. There were squirrels, beaver, chipmunks, raccoons – all sorts of ‘em. I saw one I hadn’t seen in these parts standing on his hind feet on a stump, too. It was a badger! Badger pelts go for a lot of creds, too, since you don’t see them so much. I notched my arrow and took aim, not wanting to spook them – I figured I could bag him first and maybe the fat raccoon before they scattered. Just as I was about to let go a mosquito or something bit me and my aim was off, so I hit the stump. Now here’s where it gets weird: instead of scattering like they normally would all of the animals looked over at me as I was notching my next arrow and started charging! Right at me! I can’t tell you how strange that was – all of these creatures running toward me like a stampede! Tall and short – oh, there were otters too, all looking at me with hate in their beady little eyes and bearing their teeth! I ran. Man did I run! I made it to the bridge and slammed the gate shut then put the chain around and locked the door, thinking that would do it and I could maybe take one of the larger ones down from behind the chain link fence, but those little chipmunks just dove straight through and started climbing my legs! I knocked a few off but more were coming through and they just kept climbing up my legs! I ran all the way back here and slammed the gate with my head between the gate and the fence. “Smooth move, ex-lax!” That was my grandpappy’s response every time I’d pull a move like that. “Smooth move, ex-lax!”
We’re out of meds, I just found out. I never took the stuff myself except in the fall when I’d get migraines. Franc was always taking them, though. He’d get headaches for no reason at all. The bottle’s probably still in his pocket but I’m not digging him up.
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This is excerpt 5 from the Survivalist POV – a side story that came from “Samuel Shinpike and the Attack of the Roadkill Zombies”
Excerpt 1
Excerpt 2
Excerpt 3
Excerpt 4
Excerpt 5
Excerpt 6
Excerpt 7